Today is Monday! Mondays are beautiful! Especially when not working lol. I still have to drop off & pick up my child from kindergarden. Seems simple...I swear it's not. That will be another blog. This blog is about my inconsistencies. Whoever has known me for a long time, knows I stop & start my YouTube. It's not really any of the "haters" that make me stop. It is my own battle with balance. I used to make fun of people who told me that they had to cancel Facebook so that they can study & love life normally again. They would deactivate. Come back when they missed it. I would get so angry. Why is social media that important!!!!! You don't have to be on there sooooo much. Well... I am now one of those people . It is So distracting. It's has become worse now though. Instagram has caused a whole other level of keeping me busy. You can't go on your computer with Instagram. It is on your phone. Always there . Staring at you. New pics new pics new pics. Did anyone like my photo? Did anyone leave a hater comment? Did anyone point out a flaw? Did my fat show? Maybe I shouldn't have posted it......maybe my pae should be private .... What if someone sees my kid at scho and recognized him from my Instagram? Is it that fair to do to your kids? What if it affect my husband's professional life showing videos of our day to day. Would his company look at him differently ? Ok I will stop. But it is realistic. I literally filmed the inside of my house. In the middle of the night. Those are the things running through my head. You can't deactivate Instagram. You would lose all your followers and people you follow bad restarting is so much work. Trust me I tried this once. It didn't keep me away .... I had my cousins password. I mean do you know how many people sign into others instagram accounts? Instagram is less complicated than Facebook. It's just a bunch of pictures. No one cares about giving away their login info. ANYWAYS I'm the queen of off topic issues lol. My point is..... Social media is now overwhelming me.... I have always loved sharing product info & writing. I feel like I was born to write . When I was 8-13 I wrote sooooooo many short stories. Then tore it up when I was done. I always had a journal. Tore it up after I wrote in it. I didn't want anyone to find that either. I'd like to call myself more unbalanced than inconsistent. When I feel like I haven't cooked too many days in a row or I'm nt being the best mom... I cut back on social media. My YouTube suffers from it too. This year I have really been trying to find myself. I never got to
Enjoy my twenties. so now being 28 with a 3 year old and 5 year old I feel like I'm having an end of 20's crisis. I'm almost there though. I figured out one of my biggest goals is INNER PEACE . When I redo my YouTube.... I hope to be more loyal ... Especially to those of you who send your love to me via email about how I need to keep going !!!! It gives me life....
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